Caught in the riptide. I saw a vision. I collided into you.

Thursday, August 27, 2015

"Calling your name in the midnight hour,
Reaching for you from the endless dream,
So many miles between us now,
But you are always here with me."
Here With Me - Susie Soh

How do you let go when you have nothing else to hold on to? How do you jump without falling? How do you cry without breaking?

I have written so many letters to you. As many as the stars could read.

I've said so much to you, and at the same time, it's not enough, never enough.

So here I am once again writing. And I have no idea what to I say to you that I haven't already, and what to say to you when I can't say what I want.

I've never been brave. Never brave enough like you.

You can love again and again, wholeheartedly and with reckless abandon. I can't.

You told me I've never told the whole truth to you before.

I'll tell you that I've never told the whole truth  even to myself, ever.

But now it's too late.

I think the hardest part is realizing, deep in some small part of me, that you might be better off without me. Whilst I'm on my hands and knees scrambling to pick up the broken pieces of myself, trying to fit everything together again.

Sometimes, some relationships are worth fighting for.


Maybe just not ours.